Thursday, October 16, 2008

Bad Ronald (1974), Buzz Kulik


Ronald isn't really all that bad. He never killed anybody. Not on purpose, at least. And didn't they kinda have it coming to them anyway? When nerdy, so-awkward-it-hurts Ronald accidentally kills a young girl, he decides to bury her instead of telling the police. He runs home to tell his mother who decides that the best plan of attack is to build him a secret room within the walls of the house, where no one will ever find him. When things "cool down" after a few months, maybe he can come out. Ronald's mother didn't count on dying during a routine gall bladder removal, and of course no one knows where the heck Ronald is, so he is clueless too.

One day, a real estate agent and a family interested in the house (but curious as to why there is only one bathroom) take a tour of the house. The agent casually mentions that the previous owner died recently. Of course, Ronald overhears this tidbit. What's he going to do now? A new family is moving in, and he is stuck in his secret room. Being isolated has forced Ronald to develop his own fantasy world (Atranta) in which he is a prince, and the youngest daughter in the house is his imaginary princess. Ronald starts to get brave, peeping at the family through one of many peep holes he has created, stealing food from their refrigerator, even attempting to read the oldest sister's diary. One day, Ronald snaps. He sneaks out of his room when everyone has left the house but his potential princess. I wouldn't dare ruin the rest for you guys.

I really think I was born in the wrong generation. I would have loved it if ABC still had movies of the week like this. This was so fucking creepy, on so many levels. I am terrified of home invasion films, and this goes even beyond that. How do I know there isn't some creep living in the walls of my house, watching as I type this right now?!?! The end of the movie was fantastic! I was so nervous to see what that little creepo would do next. I can hardly believe this was made for TV!

Grade: A

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