Attack of the B's!

Dèmoni (1985), Lamberto Bava
Demons

Oh, you don't like fast zombies? Oh, and you don't like it when people become zombies in inexplicable ways? What's that? You like movies with a plot? Really? WELL TOO BAD. Dario Argento and Lamberto Bava don't give a fuck. A mysterious man hands out free tickets to a movie at a mysterious theater no one has bothered to notice before. Via an evil looking metal mask, this broad becomes infected with the virus of the undead. The doors of the theater seal themselves, and the patrons are trapped inside, with clever, bloodthirsty zombies running amok. There is eye gouging. There are zombie babies. There is coke being snorted out of coke cans. There is a never-ending supply of unintentionally hilarious one-liners. This is an amalgamation of everything an 80s slasher/zombie film should be. This is the standard to which all other such movies had to compare themselves to. Also, Dario Argento has really hot daughters.

Best Line: "THAT WILL TEACH YOU TO TOUCH THINGS!"

Grade: A